You are the sky.

You are the sky.

Endless, Boundless, Eternal.

There was a You before you were born, there will be a You after you die.

You were created in Love, you will die in Love, you will know Love through eternity.

Your entire life here is just a cloud, passing through on a sunny day.

Your greatest joy, your greatest sorrow… mere raindrops.

Everyone you meet in this lifetime, everyone you’re connected to?

They are a part of this eternity with you.

Nothing is Permanent.

You are the sky.

(written May of 2020) 

(View of Skyway Bridge, taken from Ft. Desoto on a glassy calm day)

Ms. Lemons is moving out!

Grace brought Ms Lemz home as a kitten just before she went off to Carnegie Mellon four years ago.

Claire stayed here with me and went to college locally, but Claire and Grace are both out of school now, working full time. Claire has been looking for apartments with her longtime boyfriend, Paul.

Ms. Lemons is really bonded with Claire and her boyfriend, so she’s moving out with Claire in a few weeks.

I’ll miss Claire, as well as Ms. Lemons. Both have been my roomies for four years. I’ll have to visit them both at Claire’s place. Lemz will be happier with Claire and Paul, she’ll get more attention from them than from me, especially if I’m out of town.

Things change, our lives move on. I’m glad Claire and Grace have grown up, it makes me really proud as their father.

This is a new chapter for me, and since I’m traveling frequently I don’t want to have another pet that needs daily care. All the plants around my house are enough, thanks to Grace!

A few weeks ago I dropped $140 at Lowe’s to buy a bunch of flowers for the front garden.

I’m rocking various pentas, some mums, roses and some celosias. Bees love my front garden.

I even planted flowers around my mailbox.

I’m totally at peace being here solo, being healthy, having a lovely home.

I also have a ton of options… the future has not been written yet, but I’m optimistic.

Ben Alexander

September 28th………………… 2021

Purpose; Professional, Personal and Spiritual.

(Beautiful birch grove, just outside of Flagstaff AZ)

This past Saturday I sang two hymns at a funeral service for a lovely woman in my church community.

Delaine Holsopple passed peacefully in her sleep last week, and her husband Gary asked me to sing “How Great Thou Art” and “Amazing Grace”.

It was an honor to do so.

Delaine was a deeply Christian woman, and Gary told me she liked those songs.

As I sat there in church, getting ready to sing, I realized that I was supposed to be THERE in that moment, there was NO other place where I was meant to be. God blessed me with a decent voice, He blessed me with my church community, and the best way that I could serve my community in THAT moment was to sing for Delaine.

For the last few years I’ve struggled with my PURPOSE, I knew that I had found my professional purpose with Tampa Bay Solar, that was a no brainer; help roll back global warming AND make a great income?

I’m grateful to be in the solar business.

In my personal life I know that my purpose is to be a good father to Claire and Grace, a loving son for my Mom and Dad and a good sibling to George, Andrea and Danielle.

Even a good uncle to my nieces and nephews.

Perhaps at some point in the future: a kind and loving husband to my wife, if I’m blessed to be married again.

Being single has given me cause to reflect, and I know that things are happening right now for a reason.

My times of loneliness, isolation, sadness have given more insight in regards to my Spiritual Purpose.

I’ve found a certain measure of Peace in this.

I’ve drawn comfort and connection from the folks in my church community.

Perhaps my Spiritual Purpose is to be with these people, love them, even sing to honor them.

There are larger forces moving within my heart, and that is OK.

Ben Alexander

September 27, 2021

Online dating weirdness.

I’ve been on and off Match since my divorce back in 2017.

I’ve met true love on Match once, thus far:

Sometimes we have to move on, because you can love someone… but if you both want different things, what’s a guy gonna do? I loved her, and I grew to love her 3 children as well. Even good things come to an end, no matter what we do.

This is from a Match profile I saw this morning:

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

No Non-Christians/masons.  No drama/melodrama.  No drugs/meds/alcohol/addiction/midlife crisis/emotionally disturbed/mental health issues.  No conning/lies/secrets/hidden agenda/gaslighting/mind-games/diversions/sabotage.  No self-aggrandizing/attention-seeking/superficiality/vainglory/vanity/selfies/shallow-mindedness.  No egoism/egocentrism/greed/golddigging/bankruptcies/failed business ventures/second mortgages/debt/credit issues.  No criminal/dubious/nefarious activities.  No entitlements/trust funds.  No communists/socialists/democrats/liberals.  No cats.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

I love how she lists all these awful things, and then “no cats” at the very end.

Her NO list makes me wonder how many awful guys she dated!

The hard part about finding a partner at my age (47) is that everyone has been hurt, everyone has had some relationship disappointments, everyone has walls up.

I get it.

I’m still optimistic about my search, mainly because this process has taught me more patience and more discernment. Going back to church helps.

More of Him, less of Us.

I’m taking action on a daily basis to be MORE healthy, more kind, more compassionate.

I don’t pray for the perfect woman, because she does not exist. I’d rather pray for more wisdom in this process.

Meanwhile? I’m doing my 10,000 steps, going to a Men’s Leadership class at at church, selling solar and paying off my dwindling mortgage.

Traveling, sometimes alone, and seeing all the amazing National Parks around the United States.

Today I’m singing 2 hymns at a funeral…. for a woman who passed in my church community.

This is my life, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Ben Alexander

September 25th. 2021

Going to see the Grand Canyon; September 2021!

Last week I flew out to Flagstaff and toured a bit around the northern half of Arizona.

Went to see the Grand Canyon, from the ground and via helicopter!

If you have never seen the Grand Canyon in person…. save up your money and go see it!

Worth every penny. The helicopter ride was $219 per person.

I got a funky little Air BnB in Flagstaff and discovered the beautiful mountain woods and Snow Bowl mountain near that area, see pics :::::::::::::

(both views from 11,500 feet at top of Snowbowl Mountain just NORTH of Flagstaff)

Sat at the top of SnowBowl and just felt peaceful. The clouds, the valley below…. pics don’t do it justice.

Explored the area around Sedona and even the weird hilltop town of Jerome.

Took a Ghost Tour. Did not see a ghost, it kinda felt like a scam.

Friday night I was driving in the mountains from Sedona back to Flagstaff and I pulled over and turned off the car lights just to look at the sky… it was so dark I could see the Milky Way and a billion other stars right above me. Worth it just to see the dark sky like that, at higher altitudes.

Travel is mentally healthy, and all that hiking and exploring is helping me get back in shape after my knee surgery last March. I’m not fully recovered yet, my health is not where I’d like it to be. I’m taking daily action to change that.

My next trip is to see Carlsbad Caverns in New Mexico… by then I’ll be a bit thinner, a bit healthier, etc.

One thing I realized while hiking at almost 12,000 feet? I’d like to be in better cardio shape, and maybe 20 pounds lighter! After I got back I downloaded the Noom app and bought a new Fitbit.

Doing 10,000 steps each day NOW will get me in better shape for my New Mexico trip!

I was totally solo on this trip, and I’ve never really done that before. During the trip I was uploading some of these pics to a family group text, so I was sharing my experience with my family…

This year has not been easy for me, there were moments when I was in pain, moments when I prayed, and cried, and felt down. I needed this trip. It was a great reset.

I’m glad I went to see the Grand Canyon, and I’m ready to move forward to a new chapter in my life that is healthy, with travel, and new horizons, maybe even new relationships!

Ben Alexander

September 17th 2021

I want to ride my bicycle.

I bought a used Talera mountain bike over a year ago… and barely rode it until recently.

My left knee was reconstructed in March, and the physical therapist told me biking would help it heal.

For several months after my surgery it was implossible to ride a bike, my range of motion had not come back yet.

When I could pedal again I started doing shorter rides…..

In the last few weeks I’ve been pedaling a 17 mile route through Wesley Chapel and New Tampa, mostly on trails and sidewalks…. takes me almost 2 hours, but it feels great when I’m done. 17 miles is no bullshit!

The bike also fits in the back of my Volt!

I went from going 170mph on a 200hp Kawasaki ZX-14 to pedaling at 15mph through the suburbs… but I’m healthier, so there’s that.

170mph is an adrenaline rush, for sure. NOT real healthy if something goes sideways at that speed.

I could still get walloped by a car on my mountain bike… so I wear a DayGlo yellow high vis t-shirt.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

I hope y’all are vaccinated!

Have a great Labor Day!

-Ben Alexander

September 6, 2021

New Jersey, flooded by water from the Gulf Of Mexico!

Hurricane Ida was fueled by warm water temperatures in the Gulf of Mexico.

That water was picked up and dumped on all the states from Louisiana up to New York and New Jersey.

Extreme weather, extreme flooding, in other parts of the country extreme drought and wildfires!

It’s time to plant a billion trees, get solar on every roof and STOP burning fossil fuels to move our cars and generate our electricity.

I’m out there every single day, helping folks buy solar all over Tampa Bay.

I’m right here when YOU are ready.

Ben Alexander

September 3, 2021

Science vs. Freedom

The Left has watched for years as the Right has denied science in regards to global warming.

Your freedom to use fossil fuels is far more important that global warming, which is a leftie conspiracy to take away your V-8 diesel truck, right?

That Leftie government wants you to drive a Prius. Damn nanny state!

So when a pandemic hits and those same scientists come up with a brilliant vaccine (thank you Pfizer) we have the same ignorance on the Right telling folks to NOT get vaccinated.

Wow. At least they’re consistent in denying science… but now they’re dying in droves.

99.7% of the current Covid19 deaths are unvaccinated adults. Wonder how those folks voted in the last election?

More Democrats are hitting age 18 every single day, more older Republicans are NOT getting vaccinated and they are the same folks dying in ICU wards all over the United States.

There is NO REASON to die from Covid19 right now, especially when the vaccine is FREE anywhere in the USA.

I have some clients with family back in India, where the vaccine is NOT free or available….

If Republicans want to save their party they need to spend a couple million $$$ out of their ad budget and tell their constituents to get vaccinated.

But they will never do that, because the Right wants to stay consistent in their narrative: Freedom is more important than Science, even if Freedom kills you.

Kind of difficult to chant “USA, USA” when you’re intubated.

Or dead.

Ben Alexander

August 2021

Don’t use your Flux Capacitor to go forward in time. Unless you do this.

Before you get in your time machine and travel forward to the year 2078 make sure you do 2 things:

  1. Look up when dangerous asteroids (see “Bennu”) are about to hit the planet and visit a future point in the years BEFORE these events happen. Bennu might hit Earth in 2082, so I’d visit prior to that. Future technology will probably take care of this issue, but there are no guarantees in life.
  2. Make sure you hire a Dr. (in 2021) with an updated vaccine waiting exactly where you land in the future.

You see, the 2021 version of your body has immunities up to THIS point in time, so all the nasty virulent stuff that pops up in the next few decades will surely kill you. And yes, Covid19 is NOT going to be the last nasty pathogen that whacks the human race.

Of course, 40 or 50 years from now vaccines might not be needed at all because medical technology will be far better than today, assuming that humany sontinues along our current path without any macro disruptions.

Someone with 2021 natural immunities who finds themself in 2078 will be like the indigenous people who met Europeans carrying smallpox 300 years ago. Entire villages were wiped out.

Read “Guns, Germs and Steel” by Jared Diamond.

Great book. He talks about how easy it was to just march over indigenous people because they would be very sick within a few weeks of first contact. Sadly, the Europeans conquerors saw this as “God’s favor” on the Europeans.

Not true, the North American people had merely been isolated from European pathogens. They had zero natural immunity.

Just like a time traveler.

This is what I’m thinking about today.

August 17th, 2021

Reducing $18,000 down to $5500.

I had knee surgery back in March of this year, and even after ER and the specialist went through my medical insurance I still had $18,000 in charges that were NOT covered.

Totally ridiculous.

So I sat on those bills for 4 months. This past week I got on the phone and negotiated all of them down to a total of $5500, and paid them off.

That’s just proof right there that we have a problems with medical costs in this country.

Imagine doing that with food, or real estate, or anything else we purchase as consumers.

I knew that if I let my medical debt fester for a few months the debtors would take pennies on the billed dollar, because they overinflated my charges in the first place.

I feel bad for people who get medical bills and don’t realize they can negotiate the balances.

Oy.

Ben Alexander

August 15th 2021

An Early DEATH, for no reason at all.

There is an older couple in my church that I’ve gotten to know over the years… and a few days ago their oldest son died of Covid19 here in Florida.

He was 61 years old, in good health, and he refused to get the vaccine.

He was listening to lies on social media, and he thought to himself “I’m healthy, Covid won’t get me” and now he’s dead. Gone. No longer able to be a father, a husband, a son….

His 84 year old mother has to bury her son, because he was stupid.

A 61 year old man should live at least another 15 to 20 years, but this guy won’t because he bought into total bullshit.

His family is paying the price.

I was sitting in church today praying for this man’s family and I began to break down and cry, just from the sheer sadness and stupidity of it all.

I don’t care who you voted for, go get your vaccine if you don’t want your family to watch you die on a ventilator.

Don’t listen to the lies and conspiracy bullshit, protect yourself.

Ben Alexander

August 1, 2021