The Theory of Extenuating Externalities.


The main challenge with relationships is that we seek to control things that we NEVER will control: whether the other person likes us, their level of integrity and character, their mental health, the other people they might be dating, etc.

In thinking about this, and in planning for 2019 I realized that the goals I set for myself by have to be totally apart from my social life.

For instance, you can’t really set any type of relationship goal because the other person represents an extenuating externality. I might be able to slightly influence the opposite gender, but the only factor I really have any control over is Ben Alexander.

In realizing this I was able to totally let go of any worries about dating, whether she likes me or not, even the question of whether there is someone out there who matches me.

For 2019 I’ve set three main goals:

#1. Help my sales team hit $1 million a month in closed deals. Our best month so far has been $624,000. We’ll hit the million mark, we’re 62% there.

#2. Pay off my humble little home. The sooner I get to the FIRST goal the sooner this goal will be accomplished.

#3. Treat fitness and health like a HOBBY and get into the best shape of my life. I’ve already lost 10 pounds since Christmas, and I feel like a million bucks.

-Ben Alexander

January 2019

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